And now...for something a bit different...

Reporter: "Well folks, I'm here awaiting the arrival of the newest member to eXtreme Wrestling Championship, but I haven't seen any evidence that he's here yet."

A young, voluptuously sassy 32 year old woman wearing a dark purple velvet dress with matching killer 4" siletto heels walks over to the reporter holding the microphone. She looks seductively into the reporter's eyes as she ever so slowly wraps her fingers delicately around the mic handle, drawing the mic closer to her lips.

Zjena: "So...you've been waiting for the newest XWC member, have you?"

She turns her gaze at the camera and continues...

"Well, let me have the pleasure to introduce all of you to the newest XWC member that you all should be afraid of... Why? Because he is a war veteran. He knows how to handle his.....gun. And he knows how to make people....*she bites her lip as she finishes the thought*...submit."

She turns her attention back to the reporter, and suddenly her seductive demeanor changes drastically as disgusted look takes its place. She yanks the microphone violently away from the reporter and pushes him away hard. She returns her focus to the camera, and that seductive look washes back over her...

"Ladies," she says with a smirk, "and gentlemen...I introduce to you...from the city where every Serbian returns to...weighing just under 100 kilograms...please welcome the one...the only..." She pauses, smiling. She licks her lips slowly, as the mic lowers down by her hips. She raises the mic a moment later, and screams into the mic, "KOJ TIJE DEDO!"

She brushes her hair behind her ears, as a raggedy old man wearing what appears to be a very old World War II military fatigues rolls up (yes, rolls) next to her in his wheelchair. He hands her his rifle, which looks like it has been recently used, and he stands up...VERY SLOWLY.

Zjena holds the microphone up to his lips, as she kisses his scruffy cheek as he begins to stammer.

Koj Tije Dedo, speaking in his native Serbian: "Hey, evo me. Ja sam stignal ovde. Ali deste vi?"

He pauses as he starts to cough, and nearly hacks up a lung. He recomposes himself, and this time continues in English.

"Y'all think that just because I am old and in a wheelchair that I can't wrestle with you, huh? You think that because I'm old that I am frail and will break, eh? Well, I'm here to tell you that I won't."

He takes his military cap off of his head, revealing several scars that have healed at various points, and continues with his mild rant.

"I've donated more blood in one month than the Red Cross gets in a year. But no matter. I am here to face the best. If you think you can take me on...then bring it. But I'm here to tell each and every one of you...if you lose, you'll have to answer the question...'Koj tije dedo?' "

Zjena pulls down the mic slightly as she whispers into Koj's ear. Koj nods in acknowledgment as she lifts the microphone back to his lips. Koj starts again in his native Serbian...

"Sam skoro zabrajo. Vi ste stoke sto neznate koj vije tatko, kamo dedo i baba." He laughs a bit, then coughs and nearly hacks up another lung. He spits off to the side, and continues.

"And for those of you that do take me on in a match...know that my contract has a simple stipulation. Any time, anywhere, but if YOU lose, you'll have to admit to the world that I'm your grandpappy."

He laughs menacingly, then kisses Zjena. "Ja ve chekam, svinje. Ja znam ja sam ti dedo...i kad ja che ti ubijem, ti che znash, i che vikash...'TI SI MI DEDO!' " He grabs a shot of some Serbian plum brandy handed to him from Zjena, holds up the glass in front of the camera, and shouts, "Ziveli!" He downs the shot, wraps his arm around Zjena, and they walk off camera as she dumps the microphone onto the reporter...